this is going out on to all my sites and blogs in support of my charity and to let all that are reading, and following know that i am serious and sincere in my endeavour to build and further my charity. i have come to the conclusion that the only way to truly do that is to in a sense confess…. as i said my charity is built on the idea and faith of helping those who needs a hand up after they stumble. i know this very well be cause for over 30 years i traveled that road, i still do. i was a handful when i was in my teens i was a handful, my mother will attest to that one…lol.. i was young and got into everything from shoplifting to drinking and smoking and everything in between. as i got older that anger that i carried in me shaped all my decisions good and bad…mostly bad. at 14 i ran away from home just know i could do a better job of raising and taking care of myself than my mom or any adult…within a year of leaving home with a person i thought i loved who i now know was just my excuse for escape i became pregnant with my first child and gave birth to him alone by myself in a hospital just a month after my 16th birthday. that child and my 2 others that i had at 18 and 20 respectively saved my life and became my legacys my reason for living and more importantly for wanting to live. even then still i struggled. i struggled with finding my place in the world, being a good mother, i struggled with pride and anger. i had not figured out why i was angry, why i felt so empty. i was just going through the motions of life not really feeling not really acknowledging anything. as much love as i had and will always have for my 3 wonderful legacies i was not a role model of a mother and failed them on a lot of levels. there are things to this day that i wish i could go back in time and do differently for them and teach them… age though i have found out is a wonderful teacher and mentor. i can sit here and type for days about every little mistake and misdeed that transpired in my life detail by detail, but at the end of the day it come down to i am no saint not by a long shot, i am not aiming to be. i am a christian who knows that i have sinned through out my life and probably will continue to… but everyday i wake up with the thought of i want to make a difference some how some way today. i want to help someone the way that there always seemed to be someone there to help me in my worse time of need. i want to help someone feel like they are not alone, that they do not have to go through whatever it is they are going through alone, and that it will be ok again. my life has been a lifetime of trials and tribulations, and my mantra through out it all has always been everything the good and the bad happens for a reason, a purpose we just have to find out what that is…..life is hard especially if you are a christian that has come out of the closet…lol…you have to stand tall and never give up even on those days you feel like you just can’t take one more step or one more breath.this charity is to help me give back to be there for others the way so many people were there for me. and i am asking for your help to make a little difference in peoples lives. that one helping hand maybe the difference in that person life that day……i have bills that i struggle to pay everyday, food that i struggle to buy, things that i need and want to do. i am not rich i am not perfect or a saint and nor do i think or pretend to be. i am just a single woman with 3 grown kids who is disabled and pretty much bed and house ridden who at 42 has spent the last 3 years of my life finally finding myself and figuring out who i am and who i want to be. i have found my way and my path. i want to help people as many and as often as i can, and i know that i can not do that by myself….so i hope this helps my charity in some way and if not maybe it will just help someone period…always be blessed my friends and family….